You need to have respect for middle school teacher Sterling Johnson. Sure, he showed up for school drunk (haven't we all ?) But the real act of hutzpah was to order one of his students "to retrieve a bottle of cognac from his car" so he could keep drinking. He then proceeded to hit on two of his 13-year-old students, rubbing the buttocks and thighs of one of them, and making a "sexual remark" to the other.

Johnson, 55, was an industrial arts teacher at the Pruitt Military Academy for over twenty years. The superintendent of the St. Louis school system plans to have him fired, at which time it's gonna be ONE HELL OF A RETIREMENT PARTY !!