Kids are portly little vermin these days, no more so than in Boston, Massachusetts, where Senator Jarrett Barrios was horrified to find his third-grade son with a "Fluffernutter sandwich" -- a traditional "Massachusetts Treat" that combines peanut butter with marshmallow fluff. He wants to introduce legislation that would "ban schools from offering the local delicacy more than once a week as the main meal of the day."

Okay, don't serve the kids your "crap-o-rama" sandwich and call it "lunch" more than once a week. Fine, right ? I mean, that's still every five days, which is a thought that horrifies the shit out of me. Ah, but not Representative Kathi-Ann Reinstein, who thinks that kids need MORE Fluffernutter sandwiches, and wants to designate it as "the official sandwich of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts"

"I'm going to fight to the death for Fluff," said Reinstein, proudly proclaiming what might be the worst campaign slogan ever.